Seven Things
by MySoulIsOnThePages
Summary: Seven random things you might not have known about your favorite Harry Potter characters. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, Hello Kitty, Apples to Apples, Olympics, Miley Cyrus, Danielle Steele, Chapstick, or Mario._

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><p><strong>Arthur Weasley…<strong>

… **is secretly in love with Hello Kitty.**

… **is starting an army of gnomes.**

… **is playing Apples to Apples.**

… **was in the Olympics in Synchronized Diving.**

… **is craving roasted peanuts.**

… **likes extra dirty martinis.**

…**wants those sunglasses you're wearing.**

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><p><strong>Molly Weasley…<strong>

… **is a kleptomaniac.**

… **went a little **_**too **_**crazy at last years Ministry of Magic Christmas Party.**

… **likes that Muggle boy down at the market.**

… **has a life long ambition to move to Saskatchewan, Canada.**

… **is wearing a Team Miley t-shirt.**

… **likes her coffee like she likes her men, frozen.**

… **is going to steal your pen.**

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><p><strong>Bill Weasley…<strong>

… **likes his new man candle.**

… **reads Danielle Steele novels.**

… **is ashamed he married a French woman.**

… **uses Chap Stick as deodorant.**

… **has a new catch phrase: Jack Ass.**

… **wants to be a werewolf.**

… **yearns to be apart of a strip poker game.**

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><p><strong>Fleur Delacour…<strong>

… **likes scratch and sniff stickers.**

… **is a Grammar Nazi.**

… **would like to remind Bill that "Jack Ass" is a catch word.**

… **wants to be a goblin for Halloween.**

… **is jealous of Dumbledore's hat.**

… **invented bacon flavoured lip gloss.**

… **wished Mario would find Peach already.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix...<strong>** wants you to review!**


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: I own nothing._

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><p><strong>Victoire Weasley…<strong>

…**wants to "hit it and quit it."**

… **puts up unnecessary flyers.**

… **uses the excuse "I'm Harry Potter's niece" way too often.**

… **is wondering why everyone is staring at her.**

… **uses her wand to light hairspray on fire.**

… **reads her brother's diary.**

… **has her skirt tucked into her underwear.**

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><p><strong>Dominique Weasley…<strong>

… **blames it on the ah-ah-ah-alcohol.**

… **wishes she were a ghost.**

… **actually likes Moaning Myrtle.**

… **is addicted to Angry Birds.**

… **likes to spell things rong.**

… **wears men's aftershave.**

… **is wondering, "What the hell is a Hufflepuff?"**

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><p><strong>Louis Weasley…<strong>

… **is constantly called Lowis.**

… **wears his Aunt Luna's lion hat.**

… **has a diary.**

… **is a fan of mpreg.**

… **can't speak French.**

… **can name all 64 Crayola crayons.**

… **is Gossip Girl. XOXO.**

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><p><strong>Charlie Weasley…<strong>

… **is going to stop in the name of love.**

… **is glad to take his bra off after a long day at work.**

… **likes Disney Princess band - aids.**

… **is wondering why he isn't in the movies.**

… **is sad.**

… **wants New York cheesecake.**

… **is in a rage because all he has is Red Velvet.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix...thanks you for your reviews and wants more.<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

_Disclaimer: I do not own anything. At all._

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><p><strong>Percy Weasley…<strong>

… **tivo'd American Pickers.**

… **is worried about calling Louis, Lowis.**

… **wants a pet ostrich.**

… **would never betray his family.**

… **wants to know what "bugger" means.**

… **now knows it's not okay to call his nephew that.**

… **has a very sore face.**

**Audrey Weasley…**

… **is a call scanner.**

… **is refusing to buy an ostrich.**

… **works for the FBI.**

… **has no maiden name.**

… **like jalapeno peppers.**

… **has many different alias.**

… **has no idea who she is.**

**Molly Weasley II…**

… **eats gillyweed.**

… **likes to rain on people's parades.**

… **somehow takes after Dudley Dursley.**

… **stole Bellatrix's Death Eater mask.**

… **has an American penny.**

… **has a burning passion for Cedric Diggory.**

… **is a necrophiliac.**

**Lucy Weasley…**

… **likes to move the football when someone is about to kick it.**

… **reads horror books. And laughs.**

… **is mentally unhinged.**

… **is telling you, that you're toxic.**

… **likes Britney Spears.**

… **bullied her way into Hogwarts.**

… **is a Squib.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix... says thank you and review! Also wants a cookie.<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

_Disclaimer: I do not own anything._

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><p><strong>Fred Weasley…<strong>

… **jams out to Journey.**

… **wants the Marauder's Map back.**

… **likes Dino Nuggets.**

… **is chillin' with Dumbledore.**

… **has a liger.**

… **is waving his hands in the air, cause he just don't care.**

… **will not be forgotten.**

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><p><strong>George Weasley…<strong>

… **makes dirty jokes.**

… **wants you to hold his "wand".**

… **sells some naughty things in his shop.**

… **stole the corpse of Nagini for "testing purposes".**

… **likes Gilderoy Lockhart's books.**

… **is RUMBLEROAR.**

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><p><strong>Angelina Johnson…<strong>

… **eats her boogers.**

… **likes her new Bieber haircut.**

… **is a snatcher.**

… **is afraid of owls.**

… **has a pet Grindilow.**

… **likes her Snuggie.**

… **is the cat's meow!**

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><p><strong>Roxanne Weasley…<strong>

… **collects fly swatters.**

… **throws up the peace sign in pictures.**

… **watches Wheel Of Fortune religiously.**

… **has a Hummer.**

… **is a maniac, maniac on the floor.**

… **has a lithp.**

… **wants a vodka soda. Right meow!**

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><p><strong>Fred Weasley II…<strong>

… **is a quiet, sensitive boy.**

… **says this is a lie.**

… **has a beard like Dumbledore's.**

… **likes the new Twilight movie.**

… **is the "Peter Pettigrew" of the Weasley's.**

… **wears different coloured socks.**

… **is a dominatrix.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix... wants you to forgive her for being late and to review!<strong>


	5. Chapter 5

_Disclaimer: I do not own anything mentioned below._

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><p><strong>Ron Weasley…<strong>

… **is extremely good at Potions.**

… **likes Slytherins. Really.**

… **is craving a Red Vine.**

… **has a crush on Madame Maxine.**

… **is destined to be with Luna Lovegood.**

… **wears a two piece bathing suit.**

… **has no soul.**

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><p><strong>Hermione Granger…<strong>

… **eats a box of corn starch a day.**

… **had an affair with Neville Longbottom.**

… **cheated her way through seventh year.**

… **wants you to lego her Eggo.**

… **smokes cigars.**

… **is BFFs with Umbridge.**

… **is frumpy but super smart.**

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><p><strong>Rose Weasley…<strong>

… **wants pumpernickel bread.**

… **is named after Rosemerta.**

… **has a Ferbie.**

… **dyed her hair to look like a Malfoy.**

… **says "ain't".**

… **is obsessed with her Uncle Charlie's Band-Aid.**

… **knows when to hold em, knows when to fold em.**

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><p><strong>Hugo Weasley…<strong>

… **says his name is Jackhammer.**

… **doesn't wash his hands.**

… **has a tattoo of a pygmy puff.**

… **talks like Jar Jar Binks.**

… **is in Slytherin.**

… **is weird.**

… **says gobble gobble gobble.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix... is wondering if you all like it. <strong>


	6. Chapter 6

_Disclaimer: I do not own anything you see._

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><p><strong>Ginny Weasley…<strong>

… **is not in love with Harry Potter.**

… **says your shoes are ah-dorable.**

… **has a hairless cat named Rookshanks.**

… **is not a good Quidditch player.**

… **eats hot dog flavoured lip gloss by the barrel.**

… **is not allowing anyone in her fort.**

… **says it's Virginia not Ginevra.**

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><p><strong>Harry Potter…<strong>

… **says his glasses are just for decoration.**

… **makes airplane noises when he eats.**

… **is the new half-blood prince.**

… **says that teapot is spreading lies about him.**

… **was on Celebrity Rehab.**

… **absotutely loves Justin Bieber.**

… **is wondering what the hell is licking his foot.**

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><p><strong>James Potter II…<strong>

… **likes to braid his sister's hair.**

… **has a favourite movie: I Love You Man.**

… **is a chocoholic.**

… **pretends to be a Jedi.**

… **was on Jeopardy, bet everything, and won.**

… **does not tease his brother.**

… **is thinking "why can't I get my own name?"**

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><p><strong>Albus Potter…<strong>

…**wants to kill his dad for naming him that.**

… **has a collection of dead butterflies.**

… **adores his Great-Aunt Petunia.**

… **has the high score on Pacman.**

… **plays the accordian.**

… **wonders how Link gets around without talking.**

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><p><strong>Lily Potter II…<strong>

… **wonders why her middle name is Luna; she isn't even dead.**

… **has her own religion called "Ramish."**

… **has pink-eye.**

… **puts eye drops in her orange juice.**

… **blew up her cat.**

… **says that was supposed to happen.**

… **is Satan.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix...says this is the second last chapter.<strong>

**The Fierce Phoenix... says that if you like this check out KatieTheInsaneGiggler's Now You Know.**

**...(also review!)**


	7. Chapter 7

_Disclaimer: Last one folks. I do not own HP or anything else mentioned below._

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><p><strong>Draco Malfoy…<strong>

…**does interpretive dance with his Aunt Bellatrix.**

… **is wondering why his mother's hair is two different colours.**

… **lives on Funions.**

… **is not a natural blonde.**

… **is a kind, considerate man.**

… **loves gingers and Mudbloods.**

… **is actually a girl by the name of Lauren Lopez.**

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><p><strong>Astoria Greengrass…<strong>

… **is doing the hokey pokey.**

… **resembles a duck.**

… **is a world-renowned DJ.**

… **goes by "As-Grass".**

… **is a Nancy Drew fan.**

… **likes to ride her bicycle, she likes to ride her bike.**

… **calls dinosaurs "Jesus ponies".**

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><p><strong>Scorpius Malfoy…<strong>

… **has a date with Wendy the Waitress.**

… **has a bright, white sports car.**

… **is two-timing with Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way.**

… **hates Rose Weasley.**

… **enjoys water polo.**

… **knows a song that gets on everyone's nerves.**

… **is a pirate.**

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><p><strong>Teddy Lupin…<strong>

… **says his dad was not involved romantically with Sirius Black.**

… **knows he is lying.**

… **never overstated a thing in the history of the planet.**

… **owns his own gas station.**

… **copies people's food orders.**

… **is a cool cat.**

… **would walk 500 miles, and he would walk 500 more.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix... wants to say thank you to all who reviewedfavorited/alerted.**

**The Fierce Phoenix... is sad this is over but will keep on truckin'.**

**(Review!)**


	8. Chapter 8

_Disclaimer: I do not own anything you see._

_AN: Yes, you read that right, I am back. Back by popular demand, I will add three brand new chapters with some of your favorite characters!_

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><p><strong>Narcissa Malfoy...<strong>

**... can't be tamed.**

**... was like baby, baby, oh!**

**... says not in that way, you sickos.**

**... works at the Apple store.**

**... hacks into people's Twitter accounts.**

**... will totes pwn u n00bs.**

**... had an affair with someone you all know and love.**

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><p><strong>Lucius Malfoy...<strong>

**... got his wang, I mean wand, taken away.**

**... is a skilled ballerina.**

**... says hate on me haters.**

**... has a shirt that says "Accio Rupert Grint!"**

**... is Team Jacob.**

**... likes the new Pretty Little Liars book.**

**... has #whitegirlproblems.**

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><p><strong>Nyphadora Tonks...<strong>

**... works at Build-A-Bear Workshop.**

**... is actually Perez Hilton.**

**... knows somewhere, a duck is staring at you.**

**... says no you dumb cat, you can not haz cheeseburger.**

**... wears apple bottom jeans, boots with da fur.**

**... is a champion at Scrabble.**

**... is still wondering if Mad Eye knows someone who lost a buttocks.**

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><p><strong>Remus Lupin...<strong>

**... ate a poopie flavored jelly bean.**

**... is fluent in Finnish.**

**... says hide yo kids, hide yo wife.**

**... made his Quidditch team eat a doe.**

**... likes his wings extra spicy.**

**... wears sunglasses at night.**

**... gives love a bad name.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix... hopes you enjoy these bonus chapters coming up. (psst...Review!)<strong>


	9. Chapter 9

_Disclaimer: I do not own anything you see._

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><p><strong>Neville Longbottom...<strong>

**... is in love with Moaning Myrtle.**

**... owns the Princess Diaries series.**

**... goes by Shlongbottom.**

**... knows the Single Ladies dance.**

**... sits in his tree house, planning his revenge.**

**... should've been the Tri-wizard champion.**

**... is hungry like a wolf!**

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><p><strong>Luna Lovegood...<strong>

**... wrote the Book Of Awesome.**

**... wears leopard print stockings.**

**... says to just dance.**

**... wears diapers, 'cause all respectable wizards do.**

**... is on Team Guy-Who-Hit-Bella-With-A-Truck**

**... likes Dragon Tales.**

**... is an animagus cat who lives with Sailor Moon by the same name.**

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><p><strong>Sirius Black...<strong>

**... is tired of the Sirius/serious puns. (siriusly.)**

**... is denying his feeling for Remus.**

**... had a nice time in Azkaban.**

**... is "A".**

**... sniffs glue and eats chalk.**

**... has a daughter named Rebecca.**

**... has his Facebook relationship status set to "It's complicated".**

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><p><strong>Dobby the House Elf...<strong>

**... wants "Puck-Berry" to be an item again.**

**... co-wrote the Bro Code.**

**... has the best lines in DH: part one.**

**... has a Club Penguin account.**

**... says Beverly Hills, that's where I want to be.**

**... has an "in" with Darren Criss.**

**... will live in our hearts forever.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix... will get hated for that Twilight joke. (psst: Review!)<strong>


	10. Chapter 10

_Disclaimer: I do not own anything you see._

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><p><strong>Albus Dumbledore..<strong>

**... hearts High School Musical.**

**... is making a troll face.**

**... 's sex is on fire.**

**... says Chuck & Blair = love.**

**... is not really gay.**

**... has a tattoo of an owl...Somewhere.**

**... #winning.**

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><p><strong>Lord Voldemort...<strong>

**... requires your wang, Lucius.**

**... picks up his dry cleaning (Just like you!)**

**... is in this months "Traumarama" section of Seventeen.**

**... goes by Volsemort, Volxemort, and Darth Vaser.**

**... has a Mario mustache.**

**... could be plotting your death, right now.**

**... wants Harry Potter to answer his texts.**

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><p><strong>Bellatrix Lestrange...<strong>

**... is not related to Emily the Strange.**

**... says when she drinks, she gets slizzard.**

**... actually likes her husband.**

**... likes to sit back to back with Voldemort.**

**... wants her wand back.**

**... is sorry for what happened to Hermione.**

**... is in a wolf pack with Frank and Alice Longbottom.**

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><p><strong>Severus Snape...<strong>

**... teaches sex ed.**

**... is wondering what the devil is going on here.**

**... says that whole Lily Evans thing was a charade.**

**... likes to play Mouse Trap.**

**... has a Glee Born This Way shirt.**

**... was a Slytherin who died a Gryfindor.**

**... says don't stop believin'.**

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><p><strong>The Fierce Phoenix... thanks all of you for reading. <strong>

**The Fierce Phoenix... says you've been great, goodnight.**


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